Bad advice
Tips, tricks, inspiration, and encouragement for storytellers of all stripes
Greetings from Sarasota—
This week we wrapped up another In Your Bones Strategic Storytelling cohort. Our final zoom together was on Wednesday.
As usual, my fellow coaches were dropping gems.
For example…
Everybody is qualified to tell you how your story made them FEEL. Very few are qualified to tell you how to make your story more impactful.
Oh my goodness yes yes yummy yes.
Human nature is entirely predictable when it comes to giving feedback. We love to give advice, usually unsolicited.
Storytellers need to learn how to filter feedback. Because audience members aren’t trained storytellers. They aren’t gonna speak the language. They may know something is good, or that something else isn’t working, but rarely will they be able to articulate why.
That’s ok. They don’t need to know why. It’s your job to translate the feedback, to hear the note beneath the note.
I had a cool theatre colleague Chuck, back in St. Louis, who would lead talkbacks after developmental readings of new plays. He used the same intro every time…
The human creature has three fundmental needs. The need for food. The need for sex. And the need to rewrite someone else’s play.
Big laugh, guaranteed. That laugh lowered the critical temperature while simultaneously setting the “rules.” Chuck could now cut off anyone who rambled down a “Well, what I would do is—” rabbit hole.
A good rule of thumb is if you hear the same comment three times, maybe give it some attention.
And do not, under any circumstances, try to explain yourself or argue with an audience member giving feedback. That is an unwinnable battle. Just smile, nod, maybe pretend to jot it down in your notebook, and say “Thank you.”
Speaking of unwinnable battles, another gem dropped on Wednesday’s zoom…
Pulling yourself up by your bootstraps is b*llsh*t.
See, pulling yourself up by your bootstraps is literally impossible.
And that was its original intent. Sarcasm.
We think the first iteration of this idea came from German author Rudolf Erich Raspe. He wrote about a character stuck in a swamp who pulled himself out by yanking on his own hair.
Impossible. Absurd.
Over time, the implication shifted to the idea of hard work being enough all by itself. That you could achieve socioeconomic advancement through solo effort, never you mind any systemic barriers or the role of external support.
Absurd. Impossible.
Yet another example of bad advice.
What’s the note beneath the note?
My fellow coach was making the point that storytelling can often be a solitary act. You think alone. You write alone. You perform alone.
But we were a cohort. We all were walking the path together. The path of vulnerability and authenticity.
You don’t have to attempt the impossible. You don’t have to go it alone. Nor should you.
I’m happy to pull on your bootstraps to help you up.
And if I need someone to pull my hair?
I’m sure I can count on you.
JOYFUL JOURNEYS
Yesterday evening at the Senior Friendship Center we launched the newest offering from Ibis Books, JOYFUL JOURNEYS: Stories and Memories from Lives Well Lived.
Seven incredible first-time memoirists. One touching, funny, inspiring anthology.
You can check it out over at the Ibis Books bookshop!
BALLS: The Monster-Catchin' Musical Comédy
If you happen to be in New York tomorrow, you’ve got two chances to see pizza wizard and all-around awesome Brooklynite Harrison Bryan in his original show BALLS: The Monster-Catchin' Musical Comédy.
You may remember Harrison from my conversation with him on the Page&Stage Podcast way back last year, when his show was percolating rather than fully produced.
There are performances tomorrow at 4:15pm and 9:30pm. You can get tix at BALLSmusical.com—and use code word “BATTLE” for a discount!
And hey, here’s his podcast interview from last year, too.
100 Plays
The next episode of 100 PLAYS will hit your inboxes first thing Monday!
In this episode, I talk about the daring it takes to direct yourself as an actor, the generosity of a Tony Award-winning playwright, and how to give your story away.
You can listen on the Substack App, and all episodes are also available on Apple or Spotify.
Or, if you want to put a face with a voice, the video version will be available on YouTube.
The Page&Stage Podcast
A reminder to check out the most recent episode with Seth Gordon.
Seth Gordon joins me to explore the power of imagination, empathy, and community in the evolving world of American theater. We discuss the post-pandemic landscape, the role of nonprofit theater, and insights from Seth’s upcoming book, Crossroads in the American Theater. Seth shares wisdom on new play development, teaching directing, and building meaningful audience connections. Packed with personal stories and hard-earned lessons, this episode offers inspiration and guidance for anyone passionate about the future of theater.
You can listen on the Substack App, and all episodes are also available on Apple or Spotify.
Or, if you want to put faces with voices, you can watch the video version of this podcast over on YouTube.
Before I sign off, a quick reminder that you can comment on this newsletter.
I do my absolute best to respond to every comment, so if something I’ve offered above tickles that question/comment/complaint nerve in your reader-brain, I’d love to hear about it. Let’s get into a fun conversation!
Thanks as always for reading, and have a great weekend—
Jason “Hair-Pulling Bootstrapper” Cannon